Remember this: when we know how to communicate well, arguments and disagreements are less likely to happen. When arguments and disagreements are less likely, so is the stress-response they cause. And stress is a killer, so we want to learn to communicate well!
Learn to listen. Communication is not one direction. It goes both ways. To become an effective communicator, you must be a good listener. All of the following examples show the power of listening: the parent who listens for the feelings of his or her child; the salesperson who listens for what kind of product the client wants; the boss who listens to the concerns of his employees.
Can you see how listening in those situations enables you to become a better communicator? Once you know what your “audience” wants, you are better able to communicate to them.
Care about the people with whom you communicate. Talk with them, not to them. People don’t want you to talk at them. They want to communicate. Think about it: the root word is “commune.” It means to live and share together.
This is what we do when we communicate together– we share words and ideas.
This means we must care about the people we are communicating with. We should be interested in their needs and desires. And when we know those, we can communicate more effectively with them.
Focus on clarity. The most effective communication is clear communication.